94 points

I find it hilarious that it didn’t work with Trump, so he went running to Kamala

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46 points

he is probably stealing more votes from Trump than Harris, so he better stay in the race

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15 points

From polling, it appears that you are correct. Although how committed those voters are remains to be seen. I think I recall Johnson polling at around 6% in 2016 but ended up with a little over 3%.

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6 points
*

Harris and her advisers have not responded with an offer to meet or shown interest in the proposal, say people familiar with the conversations.

The Kennedy outreach, made through intermediaries, follows a meeting in Milwaukee last month between Kennedy and Republican nominee Donald Trump to discuss a similar policy role and endorsement that resulted in no agreement.

I imagine that Kennedy would like some return on kingmaking.

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6 points

well he’s going for the uneducated fuckwit vote, so yeah.

wasn’t necessarily true before, mind you. i think a lot of people were going to vote for him just because they didn’t want to choose between the same two dudes again.

also the more he talks the more he’ll drive away any voters lucky enough to have multiple neurons, and maybe steal a couple single neuron voters.

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41 points

Dudes not qualified to wipe her ass

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3 points

Maybe an official intern ass wiper

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4 points

Assistant to the intern.

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24 points

Maybe he could try bringing her a dead animal as an offering.

It works for shrikes and he’s got some experience with it.

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23 points

Secretary of Trichinella has a nice ring to it.

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26 points

Secretary of Roadkill Disposal

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11 points

Ambassador to the Moon

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6 points
*

can we give Trump the Secretary of Roadkill and see who wins?

thunderdome style.

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1 point

Secretary of Falconry

At least he’s arguably qualified for this.

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