I consistently have this issue where I legit cannot tell if someone is being snarky or mean it just bounces right off. Then i spend ages wondering if a certain phrase was meant to be an underhanded insult or not or what the subtext was supposed to be.
Previously yes. It’s something that has gotten better with reading, therapy, and supportive relationships. I blame the lack of adult relationships growing up, as i think it’s something that needs to be taught.
I know that a “support network” can be hard to obtain, but it’s helpful to have mates to bounce things off of. Hexbear can do that for certain situations.
I do that, but I’m trying to stop. Someone will say something or make a face when I say something and I’ll obsess over what it meant for ages. I usually come to the conclusion most damaging to my psyche.
I’m trying to just assume everyone loves me and that they’ll tell me if they dislike me or I said something cringe. I think it’s the best way for me. I might miss a sneaky insult or not react to someone’s dislike of something I’ve said, but I’ll be happier.
I just assume most people hate me. Probably not healthy, but easy to not get burned
I’m relatively decent at judging intentions for an autist, but it’s very difficult to know whether I will be perceived as mean or not.
Relatedly I have a hard time with people trying to do a gotcha! to be dismissive. I remember a moment where a lib asked “why don’t you just go live in Russia, then?” For them in their world, that’s like a final judgement - you clearly don’t care about this DEMOKKKRACY so FUCK OFF. It simply didn’t have that connotation for me and I missed the perception check so I was left wanting for discourse going “but Russia is yucky blah blah blah” when the conversation had already ended.
I chalk it up to them being a dweeby weirdo who relies on the luxury of some sort of strength/assumption instead of learning to communicate. Usually life, fate, and time have a way of frustrating them for doing so, therefore I just try to associate with people who value clear communication.