this has been on my mind a lot. I follow some lesbian meme shitposting groups and there’s tons of memes that are just like “This girl looked at me and I died and then she smiled at me and I came back to life” and I just cannot think of any cishet men’s spaces that bring that have that level of absolutely dorky dysfunctional love for women. And, like, cishet men, their whole thing is supposed to be being in to women, and that just strikes me as really weird that there’s not an equivalent. Like the closest I can think of is wife guy memes but that’s just one wife, usually.
Do any spaces like that exist? Is it even possible given the way gender works in society?
In a hypothetical situation in which I was a guy whose eyes were temporarily replaced by cartoon stars due to the attention of a cool lady, I would not feel comfortable indulging in that feeling online due to fears of both the potential negative reaction of other men and the potential negative reaction of women.
Exactly.
I feel like changing the observer to a cis man changes the dynamic significantly. It can easily come off as desperate or some other negative associations. It also seems a bit like the default. “Oh, you’re a man that likes women? No way, wow.”
I love women and cute ladies but I’m not about to be making memes about that any time soon.
Right! It feels like that sort of sentiment expressed by a man would generally come off as creepy or threatening to a woman reading it. That’s no fault of the writer or reader, it’s just a nice sentiment buckling under the weight of… well, all of human history w/r/t gender. I’m sure there are places where one can express such things (here? maybe?), but in general, it feels much safer to just not bother.
It’s one of the many reasons that I enjoy seeing the viewpoints of trans folks. I’m a cis man, but the way trans women express appreciation and affection toward women on this Internet is lovely and resonates with me
No, that’s illegal under gender. Plenty of men feel that way, and are allowed to quietly discuss it with one or two other men in a sufficiently relaxed and emotionally open environment, but under no circumstances can they publicly state that they have feelings.
“omg a pretty girl looked at me and I forgot how to exist”
The fact that I didn’t know if you were going to dunk on the men for saying something like that or not answers your question perfectly.
Even half this site would take a cynical approach to a dude being that way
This is one of those blowback cases of patriarchy hurting men. Because the dominant social structure has men objectifying and harassing women constantly, it can be difficult to openly admit to finding a woman attractive as a man because people, very understandably, are going to assume that he means that in an objectifying way or is going to go harass her in public trying to get a date out of her and respond accordingly.
It obviously doesn’t compare to the consequences faced by femme presenting people, but I’ll have a moment every now and again where my bi femme partner and I will notice someone in a cute outfit and I have that moment of knowing that she could walk up to them and compliment them on it without issue, but if I tried to do the same they’re likely to be defensive and assume I’m about to ask them for their number.
why are u as a man liking a woman pretty gay bro 😂😂😂
I was literally asked if I’m gay by a friend, I told her “No, I like women. Especially tall and muscular ones”. And then no joke, she said “So you’re Bi?”.
How the fuck does one come to conclusions like these 😭😭😭
Gender and sexuality as social performance : p you can’t just be, you also have to do the musical dance number correctly.
Do any spaces like that exist? Is it even possible given the way gender works in society?
I think you can find cishet men that be like this but under no circumstances would you ever find an intentional community of explicitly cishet men doing this.
