Intralexical
You would probably begin by having the police break into canneries and tyre factories to beat dents into any round objects they produce, then end up having to concentrate enough mass in neighbouring states to distort spacetime to the point where π, as measured on a non-Euclidean circle with locally Euclidean constant curvature or radius or something, does in fact equal the number you said it is.
Yeah my name is Link man,
I’m more well known than Lil’ Wayne
What’s that? You thought my name was Zelda?
That’s a fucking girl’s name!
I’ve saved the world like fifteen times,
And saved the princess from demise
And I do it all alone with no help and no advice!
(Hey, look, listen!
Hey, look, listen, you _ annoying fairy!
I’d rather be forced to listen to constant Katy Perry.)
I’m called the Bushwhacker
And my bank account’s maxed.
Got 999 rupees,
But I’m forced to pay out the ass for these bombs in Castle Town.
So I can kick that dumbass Ganon
All the way to Argentina!
L to the I to the N to the K, and he ain’t gonna stop 'till the world is free of evil.
Legend of Zelda? Fuck that! Legend of Link!
Credit (and blame) to Smosh. By the way, while we’re at it, can someone lend me their tomahawk, or maybe some meat in my mouth? Also, who’s Evil Kneivel?