15 points

There are few things sweeter than sleeping in on a Saturday and waking up to a clean, quiet house.

You couldn’t pay me to trade that for some whiny, entitled little brat.

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12 points

There are few things sweeter than sleeping in on a Saturday and waking up to a clean, quiet house.

Waking up early, making pancakes for a couple of gleeful little munchkins, and then going out to the park to run around and have fun is one of those things you forget you used to love doing when you were younger.

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2 points
*

True, until one of them screams about something that doesn’t matter and you have to will yourself not to strangle them.

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1 point

one of them screams about something that doesn’t matter

I mean, one of the challenges of child care is having empathy for kids who are still struggling to regulate their emotions. If you’re openly dismissive and adversarial to kids, their behavior tends to get worse over time.

There are plenty of people who simply aren’t mature enough, themselves, to know how to interact with children. That’s one big reason why its helpful to have large extended family homes. Grandparents - particularly those who are retired, experienced, and nostalgic for parenthood - can be way better at dealing with little kids than adults who are themselves too emotionally congested and socially anxious to know how to respond.

But people routinely overstate how difficult child care can be, in large part because they fixate on the grumpy and frustrated children while suffering total blindness towards the happy, well-adjusted, and well-behaved kids.

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10 points

To be fair I encounter that problem with other adults, too.

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4 points

Nah. I’m good. My vagina is in tact and I don’t end up bear homicidal every day.

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2 points

You cannot rationally explain why it’s fulfilling to have kids. The payoff is largely emotional.

Sleeping in got old for me at some point.

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2 points

You cannot rationally explain why it’s fulfilling to have kids.

That’s certainly true.

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1 point

As a father and a very rational person, I can fully understand you.

Especially if you don’t have any kids around you and/or problems inside your family anyways.

I’d lie if I said I wouldn’t sometimes love to have some alone time. But I would never go back to sleeping in every Saturday and missing out on my child.

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41 points
*

Not one of them cares tbh. Besides, not having kids, is the best environmental friendly option of them all.

I’d guess that having children, in the long run is more environmentally harmful than you eating meat the rest of your life.

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-13 points

I’d guess that having children, in the long run is more environmentally harmful than you eating meat the rest of your life.

This just strikes me as silly. What is the “environment” but children of various species? Obviously an environmentally harmonious life is best, but life isn’t just what the environment is for, it’s what the environment is. This is the same mindset as people who have a couch that no one’s allowed to sit on.

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2 points

I find a lot of people can kind of fall down from this path, into anti-natalism, and then malthusianism, and then ultimately eco-fascism and eugenics, through what I like to call the “idiocracy deduction”. Name pending. The sort of idea that, if stupid people are the only one having kids, only stupid people will promulgate, and then we’ll all be stupid. Substitute stupid, for whatever political ideological group you don’t really like (or even minority group), bam, shit’s wacked. So, logically, stupid people, or, my political opposition, or, people I don’t like/who can’t be trusted to have kids, shouldn’t be allowed to have them. After all, you know, it’s more ecologically conscientious to not have kids, so we should just kind of force everyone to not have kids. A lot of this is also going to come down to like, third world countries tending to have higher birth rates because of higher infant mortality, and also tending to have higher emissions, and those two are connected because ???. It’s sort of the inverse of christian conservatives who want to force every white anglo saxon protestant into having 70 billion kids, and then do things like ban abortion on those grounds.

I think there’s also this like, really stupid idea that if we have more people, somehow those people will not have any jobs, based on some naturalistic concern. This is stupid. It’s less that we’ve surpassed the planet’s carrying capacity, and more that we all are just fucking morons who live in an 18th century economic hellsystem. That’s the core of why mathusianism doesn’t work, because there is no “hard” carrying capacity to the planet. People in ancient times had to occupy much larger portions of land in order to support themselves, because their crops were not selectively bred to maximize their calories, and because of diseases and shit, which is part of why agriculture sucked back in the day compared to hunter-gathering, (even though in practice the two aren’t really that different, hunter-gatherers just move around more and thus have access to that larger space which they need to “grow their crops”). In any case, you’d have to build some argument that we’ve entered a period of natural technological stagnation, which is pretty fucking hard to do because you have to thoroughly discount any conceivable future technologies that might help, and you have to discredit the amount of blame resting on the current economic system.

So, yeah, I dunno. I find the whole dealio kind of dumb and stupid. Seems like an overcorrection, kind of like those hardcore atheists that were everywhere in the 2000’s and 2010’s, and you could tell they’d all grown up being raised by radical fundamentalist christian parents or whatever, or just that christians are fucking annoying (big if true), and then have kind of a limited perspective, even just on all religions, because of that, on top of not really being politically different enough from those christians, if you actually boiled it all down. Everyone’s a neoliberal, at the end of the day, everyone’s buying in to the same premises and arguments, even when they disagree on some issue, and then they all fail to see the bigger picture and just kind of end up splintering themselves into more and more radical extremist positions.

Actually you can stop reading here (if you even read all of that, good luck), but I kind of wonder if that’s just like, an inevitable facet of late stage capitalism. It sort of seems to me like the ideological version of spam, which I tend to think of a lot as an analogy for capitalism “maximizing efficiency”. Spam is nonsense, nobody wants to read it, and yet, it will inevitably eat up all the bandwidth if left unchecked, because those with the most economic resources want to cut out all other avenues of communication, and, “make efficient use of the bandwidth”. The fact that everyone eventually becomes kind of radicalized and pushed into these nonsensical extremist positions, totally lacking nuance, the fact that, you know, people slip into fascism, it seems kind of along the same lines. People get pushed to what the maximum extent of their political ideology will allow, through some mechanism, despite liberalism kind of inherently being a modest and compromising ideology at heart, one that becomes incoherent if you actually push it to any logical extremes. I dunno if there’s anything there, about how people’s conceptions of things gets shaped by like, the larger economic system at work.

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3 points

Upvote for partial agreement, but why the attack on atheism? It’s not extreme to not believe, in fact, it sounds utterly ridiculous that you want moderate or liberal people to believe a little bit in fairy tales, but not too much. There simply is no middle ground with regard to religion, either you delude yourself or you accept the obvious implausibility, lack of evidence and irrationality inherent to them.

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23 points

When one species growing prevents others from doing the same there is a problem in that ecosystem. For example too many wolves in an area can cause a reduction in prey which is also bad for the wolves. We’re just smart enough to see what we’re doing is harmful to the world around us and we can do things to limit our damage.

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-13 points

And not enough wolves causes an unchecked increase in prey which is bad for the rest of the environment. As I said, harmonious coexistence is best. We have the knowledge and tools to live harmoniously. My problem is with the trend of un-nuanced universal anti-natalism.

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7 points
*

Humans have not only sat on that couch; we’ve slept on it, puked on it, taken a dump on it, taken it outside and set fire to it.

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-7 points

As does every other life form, given the chance. We are the only one, that we know of, which even has a concept of conservation. We have the power to consciously regulate our behavior.

In the end, my point is that either life is valuable for its own sake, including humans, or it isn’t, including the rest of the ecosystem. Any philosophy which posits that the existence of other life forms is more valid than that of humans is foundationally inconsistent. I’m certainly not saying that human life is more valid than others, but either life is valid or out isn’t. Humans aren’t special one way or the other.

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8 points
*

Most do care imo. This Christmas with relatives it was asked many times like no one cares about any other part of my life

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14 points
*

Most of your ancestors are dead. And even among the living ones I’d argue that the majority don’t really care. Never the less, who cares if they do.

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1 point

I live in a land where the “Founding Fathers” are mentioned on the news at least once a week

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-25 points

If having children is bad for the environment, then fuck the environment

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1 point

if the environment is fucked so are you and your kids

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3 points

Then how will said kids survive without the environment, or are you okay with them suffering and dying later.

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34 points

Pretty much.

“Oh … But I want kids”, adopt why bringing another being to this fuckshow when u could improve the life of one currently in the bottom of the barrel.

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5 points
*

“You never know. I mean, what if my baby cures cancer?” —Someone I’m paraphrasing but not by much ffs

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49 points

Not sorry at all. These genetics are just a dead end. I’m making the human race better. Addition by subtraction.

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-5 points

Ok so just self eugenics 🙄

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-1 points

Absolutely nothing wrong with eugenics when applied properly. Like nuclear power, AI, the internet, eugenics would fix a lot that’s wrong with humanity. If I could generically engineer myself into someone with no anxiety disorder or adhd or no postural tachycardia or naturally muscular body maybe even different color eyes and a different voice, I would. My genes aren’t unique and my traits don’t need to be passed on. I’m not a chinchilla.

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1 point

What you are describing is gene therapy, not eugenics. When eugenics was a thing, it was mostly voluntary in liberal countries. Propaganda was used to convince “inferior” people to sterilize themselves, including black people. How is that different than reinforcing the idea that “dysgenic” people are doing the right thing by not having kids?

My genes aren’t unique and my traits don’t need to be passed on

I never said they did. Some people will never have kids and that’s fine. That’s not the issue at hand with eugenics. Eugenics is treating people like chinchillas actually, animals that must be bred and selected for the best traits.

If I could generically engineer myself into someone with no anxiety disorder…

That’s the thing, you can’t. Not synthetically at least. The current gene framework is a house of cards and it will be replaced by a better system of understanding. Look into Denis Noble’s work. Also look into epigenetics. The genes you pass on to your children are not the genes you inherit from your parents, they change, and they are changed by your body in response to your environment for the better. No organism is doomed to the fate of inferior genes, they are naturally mutable. But perhaps your environment and lifestyle is not serving you well, and that may be your real problem.

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5 points

Exactly so. I don’t want to saddle up a kid with my problems.

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32 points

I know!

Considering my ridiculously high-magnification contact lenses, my ancestors have no idea what I’m up to. They couldn’t even see across the room.

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5 points

Yep, my partner and I have way too many medical issues so we don’t feel bad at all for not bringing kids into this already fucked up world.

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9 points

Mine are looking up and nodding in approval.

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12 points

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2 points

“That son of a bitch lars finally put a kink in our crazyhose. Blessed be.” —my dead peeps probs

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13 points

When I was a teenager I wanted kids. I fully bought into ‘the American dream’ being sold. I’d get me a wife, kids, house, and a career. Helped that I actually like kids. Made it my life’s goal to try to be the best provider, best dad, best husband I could be.

Put myself through college, I have a good career, bought a house when I was 24, and still love kids. But I gave up on dating when I was like 28(?). It just became not worth it for so many reasons.

This last fall marked 20 years since I left my hometown to start my life… And I felt like a failure (still do). I exist to work and pay bills.

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