100 points

I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. If you are looking for ransom I can tell you I don’t have money, but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my food go now that’ll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you, but if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you and I will kill you.

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47 points

Delivery Driver: Please understand… it was all business. It wasn’t personal.

OP / Liam Neesan: It was all personal to me.

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44 points

Takeout

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3 points

Takenout

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6 points

Good luck…

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53 points

“Fair enough. I’ll defer reporting you for lack of delivery. Hope your day gets better!”

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65 points

If I’m ordering delivery I’m probably not in the greatest place either, but I’m not heartless.

“I’m sorry to hear you’re having a bad day. Bring me my food unscathed, and I’ll place a second order you can pick up and keep. What do you want to drink?”

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15 points

I read the note in dramatic Shakespearean voice 8/10 not bad at all

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8 points

Wouldn’t some other driver be able to pick that one? I don’t think it would work too well…

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8 points

Don’t do it through the delivery, set it for pickup and give them the details.

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34 points
*

I would guess this person has reached their breaking point many many times.

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31 points

So… what do you say to that?

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117 points

Screenshot and send to door dash personally. Sorry you’re having a bad day but maybe I am too? Maybe I’m having a worse day and couldn’t bring myself to cook. Dasher wants to get food at the place I ordered from? Awesome. Go for it. This is stealing though and idc how bad of a day you’re having. You shouldn’t be delivering food if you can’t… Deliver the food

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4 points

I wonder if there was a tip too

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1 point

Motherfucker is going to have the worse day after he eats my food.

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-20 points
*

It’s not stealing really, because you can report it for a refund, and the refunds on those apps happen pretty quickly. It would be annoying, but you would get your money back. Your money is basically in escrow until a while after you get your food, so you can also get refunded if your order is messed up. The driver doesn’t even really get in trouble unless they mess up often, they just don’t get the fare for that trip.

I mean it’s still a shitty thing to do, but it’s more like getting bad service than stealing. The same outcome would happen if your drivers vehicle broke down, for instance.

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17 points

It’s 100% stealing

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11 points

The driver doesn’t even really get in trouble unless they mess up often

This is 100% either a strike on the driver’s account or they will just “fire” them outright. Especially if it’s doordash. Fuck doordash.

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29 points

I mean, me personally? “I fuckin feel that, no worries”

Most people? “That sucks” and contact doordash support for a redund prolly

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42 points

Remember you’re hungry when you get this message. IDK about you but rhat turns me into a different beast altogether.

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16 points

Don’t get me wrong, I’d be pissed. However, I’ve been in a similar state, and making them feel worse than they already are really isn’t something I want to do. I’m certainly not some saint that instantly forgives and forgets, but this person clearly has some serious problems and I don’t want to make it worse for them

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8 points

Hangry is no joke. First thing my wife asks me if I have an attitude is if I’m hungry. 9/10 I am.

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3 points
*

I would probably say something like:

“I feel you, homie. I’m making another order—what do you want?”

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3 points

Words

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2 points

I work for Liam Neeson, you just ate his lunch.

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0 points

His doctor just told him he’s riddled with aids.

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20 points

“Dam, sorry to hear that, hope you get better.” reported

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