709

NEW JOB!(lemmy.world)

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Maven (famous)@lemmy.world
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lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world
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yiliu@informis.land
77 points

Hi Tom,

I was just taking a look at your resume, and your experience at Deceased really caught my eye! I’m especially interested in your knowledge of being missed by friends and family. Did you know that complications from heart surgery is in high demand right now?

I’m a head hunter looking for dynamic individuals who are interested in positions at an exciting new startup, and I think you’d be a perfect fit!

I hope we get a chance to chat soon!

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AlecSadler@sh.itjust.works
11 points

Turns out to be an insurance phone salesperson job 9/10.

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FozzyOsbourne@lemm.ee
4 points

A head hunter is how he got this job in the first place!

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Rascabin@lemmy.ml
58 points

Dang. Even he got a new job. My “not selected for the position” emails are at 376 currently.

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Anamana@feddit.de
27 points
*

The new normal. You’re lucky if an actual person reads your application nowadays.

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Sharkwellington@lemmy.one
11 points

I’m so exhausted. Just shoveling resumes into the void.

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jaybone@lemmy.world
4 points

2019 - Present

Professional Resume Void Shoveler

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TexMexBazooka@lemm.ee
3 points

Think of resumes like SEO. You just gotta have the right key words- best way is to pull the text from the job desc of what you’re applying to

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frickineh@lemmy.world
8 points

I’m starting a job search today and dreading it. There are only like 5 positions open right now that fit with my skills and also pay even close to a livable amount of money, so that’s not great. Deceased sounds like a great opportunity at this point - no commute and you don’t need a living wage if you’re not living.

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slingstone@lemmy.world
5 points

Nah, dude. Just wait until the deceased field gets oversaturated. All the hordes of people wandering pointlessly, everybody trampling over everyone else trying to eat the organs of the living…it’s a dead end job that’ll get worse with time.

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Sotuanduso@lemm.ee
7 points

You get those emails? Nice.

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misterundercoat@lemmy.world
5 points
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(Gets a job by knowing someone) I can explain!

You didn’t have to interview? I had to go to through three interviews!

I’d love to get an interview. All I get are rejection emails.

You guys are getting responses?

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foofiepie@lemmy.world
53 points

Oh wow this is real.

Nice, someone congratulated him in the comments. 😂

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driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br
24 points

My retirement plans be like:

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ODuffer @lemmy.world
41 points

Dead end job

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FartsWithAnAccent@fedia.io
33 points

This man has won capitalism

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