Police were able to rescue child, who is in hospital with non-life-threatening injuries, before house caught fire with father still in it

A six-month-old baby is currently hospitalized after a man allegedly shot the infant several times during an armed home standoff in Surprise, Arizona, about 30 miles north-west of Phoenix.

At about 3am on Friday, the father of the child allegedly broke into the home where the child and mother lived, according to Surprise police. The child’s father did not live in the house, police said, adding that the man held the mother and child hostage for several hours before the mother managed to escape.

According to police, the mother contacted a construction crew and requested that they call 911. They added that she had minor injuries and it remains unclear how she managed to escape.

103 points
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according to Surprise police.

I know it’s the city name, but damn it.

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30 points

If they don’t yell “surprise police!” every time they knock on a door, they’re wasting their lives.

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17 points

Baby shot in, surprise, Arizona

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10 points

NO ONE expects . . .

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9 points

The key to victory is the element of surprise.

SURPRISE!

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4 points

Mother fucker!

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7 points

Thrift store’s Spanish inquisition.

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4 points

Their captain? Jack Aubrey.

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3 points

Shit is gonna get a TV show now

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5 points

Already had one.

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3 points

SurpriiiiBLAM BLAM BLAM!

He resisted!

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1 point

Our chief weapon is surprise. Surprise and fear. Our TWO chief weapons…

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2 points

What about their fanatical devotion to the pope?

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45 points

the man shot his kid, not the cops? Big if true.

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32 points

I’m sitting in the pediatric ICU with my 1-month old child. Yesterday, she went into respiratory arrest and they called a code blue on her. I thought she was dying in my arms, and I’m still shaking with fear, although she’s doing better. I CANNOT FATHOM any father putting their child into such harm. I hope, with all my heart, the child recovers fully, and the father died (or dies) slowly, screaming.

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15 points

my friend, having been in the PICU when our child had a luckily fairly mild issue, the people that work there are heroes. Lean on those you love. I wish you the best.

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29 points

It remains unclear how the fire started or what condition the father is in. According to police, an investigation remains under way and the father is not in custody.

Seriously?

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26 points

I’m assuming he’s not in custody because he’s in the hospital. There’s no way they’re letting this guy get away; in an increasingly polarized society, few things bring everyone together more than being anti-shooting-a-fucking-baby

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2 points

Dogs and babies. That’s about peak FAFO territory.

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2 points

Well, people still tie dogs to trees for their entire lifetimes in the area i live in. Though, it’s not uncommon for these fucks to also have another dog that lives inside the house. I’m not sure they care that much about their children, either…

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16 points

The surprise police are still trying to figure out what story to tell.

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14 points

“Once the [tactical units] get the clearance to go into that residence, we might have an update on him,” Hernandez said.

Sounds like they don’t think he left the burning house with the collapsed roof. If that’s the case, there’s a good chance that he’s dead.

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1 point
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1 point

Must have been one wild escape attempt then

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28 points

How in the hell is that baby still alive after being shot multiple times? That’s amazing enough for an adult but a baby is so compact and fragile comparatively. That’s pretty incredible from a physiological perspective.

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15 points
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Small caliber low power bullets can be deadly or cause minor wounds depending on whether they hit anything important.

I’m still surprised a baby survived multiple, since they have a lot less important parts like major muscles.

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7 points

With how they are small I can’t imagine landing two shots without dealing a lethal damage. In a flat 2d projection, like a target on a shooting range, an adult have, say, an area for 300 shots total, while a baby has like 50. They are very lucky.

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4 points

Babies are both very fragile and very resilient. For example, bones don’t start hardening and fusing for several years, so they can take a lot of bumps and such. I haven’t read the article, but it’s possible that the wounds were just grazing.

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-3 points
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Cops can’t aim for shit.

Edit: The fact that this joke is believable enough to get you guys bent out of shape really goes to show how fucked up things are with the police in this country. Y’all are like “Get the pitchforks, the police didn’t shoot the baby this time!”. It’s hilarious and depressing at the same time. I’ll be sure to add the /s next time.

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9 points

According to the article, the police officers didn’t shoot the baby, the father did.

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4 points

Well we know you didn’t bother reading the article.

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0 points
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