Dixville Notch, NH has returned the first results in the 2024 US election. The town voted at midnight and only six ballots were cast, so tallying the results didn’t take long. In the presidential race the results were evenly split, with 3 votes each for Kamala Harris and Donald Trump.

https://www.wmur.com/article/midnight-voting-new-hampshire-election-results-24/62810457

And now we get the first spot of color on the map, courtesy of Associated Press:
Edit: AP has now removed the blue squares in New Hampshire from their map.

https://apnews.com/projects/election-results-2024/

91 points

In the event of an exact tie, the seat is awarded to the male candidate, and the female candidate is put in jail. /j

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24 points

In the event of a tight race, the Supreme Court can decide to speed up the process by not counting black votes.

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38 points

In the event of a tie, the winner will be determined by whomever can bake the best spinach quiche in 2 hours or less.

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15 points

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5 points

In the event of a tie the candidates will compete in a no disqualification escape the cage match. To air at 9pm est Saturday November 30th only on pay per view.

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37 points

Funny, over here results can only start coming in when all polling stations are closed so as not to influence the vote of people further west…

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16 points

That’s standard practice everywhere else in the US. New Hampshire has this thing about being first, though. They have the earliest presidential primary as well. Releasing early results for this one tiny town is a minor publicity gimmick that shouldn’t have any impact on the overall election. Even the rest of New Hampshire’s towns will wait until Tuesday evening to report their results.

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64 points

This is gonna be a long week.

(Famous last words)

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57 points

I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.

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8 points

I picked the wrong week to stop shooting heroin.

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8 points
*

I tried edibles on Saturday for the first time, as a test run for tomorrow the rest of the week.

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9 points
*

Agreed. Part of me wants to skip classes for the week and just black out for a few days, at least until Pennsylvania’s called.

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2 points

Jack Danials is about to have a hell of a bonus week!

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25 points

“Man, what a long week, huh?”

“Lemon, it’s Tuesday.”

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10 points

“Yeah, well…you shot a guy.”

“What? No. That wasn’t this show. You’re breaking the 4th wall, Liz.”

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4 points

(alec baldwin’s character did actually shoot a guy at the end of season 5 episode 21 but that was a full season and a half later)

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39 points

Do you think they made it a tie on purpose? They knew they had the chance to troll the entire country and took it, lol.

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47 points

Has Trump declared victory yet?

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26 points

He’s probably fighting a bad case of reflux and diarrhoea because he is even with a woman of colour.

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Mildly Interesting

!mildlyinteresting@lemmy.world

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This is for strictly mildly interesting material. If it’s too interesting, it doesn’t belong. If it’s not interesting, it doesn’t belong.

This is obviously an objective criteria, so the mods are always right. Or maybe mildly right? Ahh… what do we know?

Just post some stuff and don’t spam.

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