I don’t know if I’m just becoming overly sensitive to my own language or if this is an actual issue, so feel free to let me know if it seems that I just need to grow thicker skin, but still.
I keep getting this uneasy feeling whenever I use the word “lame” and I think it’s because I’m starting to realize it’s technically ableist. However, there’s no single non-profane word that I know of that fits the niche that I use it in.
For example, I wrote out something earlier about a behavior I do that I don’t like that I do because I think it’s kind of shitty behavior, but it’s overall harmless. I use lame to describe it casually. I could also call it kind of shitty, as I did before, but not to audiences that I don’t want to use profanity around.
Anyone know of a word I can replace “lame” with?
I’d say maybe weak, but that’s got its own baggage that I’m not sure I’m ok with switching to. Annoying is too strong of a word for what I’m going for. Maybe lame is a short word for “this makes me feel slightly sad”?
Idk, so I open it up to the public: Is this even an issue or am I being too sensitive? Could this be solved in a single replacement word or do I need a whole ass phrase to express this?
Personally, I think it’s fantastic that you’re examining your language in this way. It’s certainly not ill-mannered, unsolicitous, infelicitous, or untoward of you to do so.
To me, the definition of ‘lame’ meaning like a lame leg or something is too dated to be the first thing most people think of in most contexts.
As a rancher “lame” is in regular usage, but it’s something that happens to animals and not to people.
A person with a persistent leg injury would simply be referred to with a sentence like “Jim’s got a bad leg, he’s walked like that since a bull ran him over”
Good friend of mine has a gimpy leg after 2 too many motorcycle accidents. He is lucky to have one of them at all. I dont think “lame” has ever come up in context of him or his infirmary.
I like “bogus” or “whack”
“Cringe” is seemingly used that way in current slang, though with an added layer of thought.
“Cringe” doesn’t have the emotional devastation that “lame” with an eyeroll does, at least according to my mother.
Only because your mom grew up with lame. If she was your age and grew up with cringe, it would hit the same way. I’m a bit in that group, I just am very attached to language so am a bit more sensitive to how it’s used to see the parallels.
Your mother is wrong:
IDC lame but I’d move mountains to avoid being cringe
“Cringe” is still a verb to many people, and being understanding of different interpretations leads to better dialogue. Knowing how to bridge those gaps with effective language can lead to intergenerational cooperation.
Pure snark which I hope you’ll see is intended to show I’m saying this as some gentle ribbing and not to put down your perspective.
Maybe dull or boring?
I’ve also stopped using the word ‘dumb’ when referring to ‘stupid’. Nowadays I only use the word dumb for muteness, and I rarely even use that word anymore, mostly mute.
I’m not mute, but to me, using “dumb” to describe someone who is mute sounds… worse? It feels like the equivalent of recognizing that “crazy” has baggage and not using it in everyday speech, but continuing to use it to describe mentally ill people. I understand that it’s not a perfect comparison, but it feels like sometimes, words become too enmeshed in their modern-day insulting uses to feel okay using them to describe a community, even if it is the technical definition of the word.
If anyone who is mute/nonverbal/nonspeaking sees this and I’m wrong - please let me know!! I don’t mean to overstep, I just want to share my perspective.
I gotta agree with you.
It feels like dumb has more baggage than meaning to the point that the baggage has become the meaning. I feel like lame is on the precipice of having the same problem, which is kind of a big motivator for me making this post to begin with.
Is that a bad thing, though?
Language evolves, words start by describing something, to become euphemisms for something else, to become swears, to end up as a description of the swear, and ultimately get either reused as a description of something else, or fall out of use.
Sounds to me like “lame” or “dumb” are quite far gone on that progression, to the point of becoming detached from the original meaning for most people. It’s great to avoid using them with the slur meaning, or in presence of those who understand it as a slur… but spreading awareness of, or teaching, the negative meaning to people who might have never encountered it, sounds like pushing the progression backwards, entrenching the word as a slur even among those who don’t use it as one.
