It’s hard to find the balance between letting the joke breathe versus making it too obvious. I’m not sure I hit that balance this time, but it seemed less funny any other way I could think to say it.

A self fulfilling prophecy, in a way.

That’s true.

With a T9 phone, I used to be able to send a complete text message without ever taking my eyes off the road.

Now that I’ve got a touchscreen I’m swerving all over the place every time I try to text. It’s way less safe.

Still the first scientific report, alphabetically.

To many of them!

🍻

Or just stop after the first sentence.

Have you tried saying, “Please don’t ask me that anymore”?

That will address the exact problem without being rude, without offending him, and without opening it up for more questions. You don’t owe him an explanation, so don’t leave an opening for one. Just say: “Please don’t ask me that anymore.”

If he asks why, you say, “Doesn’t matter. Please don’t ask me that anymore.”

If he offers an explanation for why he’s asking you that, you say, “Ok. Please don’t ask me that anymore.”

Neat and easy. No unintended consequences.

Obviously I don’t know what your finances are like, but is it possible she’s just enjoying herself and considers it a hobby? Comparing it to other games, $100/month can seem ridiculous, but comparing it to other hobbies, it might not be that bad.

I used to be unwilling to spend any amount on a mobile game until I thought about how much I used to spend playing Magic: the Gathering. Sometimes hobbies cost money.

Another nugget of wisdom from her: one time she asks me, cryptically, “What happens when the wind blows?”

It just sounds like such a profound question. So I’m wracking my brain to figure out where she’s going with this, and eventually I say, “I don’t know.”

“The cradle will rock.”

Of course.