8 points

A circuit break-her

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27 points

Clearly forgetting the poop-hole-loophole

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9 points

“Fuck me in the ass cause I love Jesus!”

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2 points

Fuck yeah, Jesus ignores assess just because!

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1 point

Oh hi, ThatWeirdGirl1001, how are you?

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19 points

i don’t know if the thrust of the original original post was meant to be homophobic, or racist, or both.

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8 points
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It’s twitter, so who knows: it might even be ironic.

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6 points

What you’re referring to as “Twitter” is achtually “X, the service formerly known as Twitter” 🤓

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6 points

The URL still says ‘twitter’.

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6 points

Well, the answer is definitely sexist. So we have all three in one meme.

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1 point

Tee hee, you said “thrust.”

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The analogy with the plugs and sockets is so lame anyways.

They want to compare a plug and a socket but the analogy falls apart once one takes a moment to realise that the penis analogy, a plug, is a receiver for electricity.

Do eggcells suddenly travel up dudes dicks and deposit babies inside them?

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10 points

Do eggcells suddenly travel up dudes dicks and deposit babies inside them?

Uhh where do you think babies come from? Duh! Got ‘em!

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17 points
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The egg needs male pee to be ready for fertilization.

So the egg travels up the urethra, to the balls (where we know pee is stored), is made ready, then travels home.

Then the jizzum is released, and chases the egg. If it arrives at the perfect moment the egg is implanted on the lining of the womb.

Activating it with an RFID antenna results in a person.

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The female uses her ovipositor and extracts a single egg cluster from her egg sac. She then shoves it into the sperm bath located in the posterior thorax of the subdued male. Once the ovicluster is fertilized she will choose to depart, letting the male live. Or she will decapitate the male. Or she will consume the male, in whole or in part.

Once fertilized the female then finds and subdues a suitable host. Using her ovipositor, she attaches the ovicluster to the host’s underside.

The eggs soon hatch triggered by the warmth of the host. Dozens of larvae burrow into the host and consuming it from the inside out to fuel their own growth. Instinctively, the larvae avoid vital organs until no other edible parts remain.

Once the host is consumed, the larvae exfiltrate the host’s remains in search for a nearby suitable place it can pupate, making its own cocoon from available plant matter and its own saliva.

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5 points

Wait, that’s not how you’re supposed to do it!?

All those seahorse documentaries didn’t prepare me for sex!

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3 points

No, it’s a great analogy. For the purposes of electrical conductivity, the gender of the socket is really just an expression of the cultural norms where they were made. There are hundreds of different socket genders, and you can easily convert one type to another depending on what you want to accomplish. Sounds like they’re really just advocating for gender affirming care.

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To answer the question implied ( how do lovers with non-hetero bits get it on? ) the answer is any way they can. The sex is not about making sure the parts fit but engaging in physical intimacy and expressing love (or at least extreme horniness) for each other, and so any given couple is going to figure something out, even if its frottage or oral or whatever.

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12 points
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That’s really confusing for me since in German we have a seperated word for engaging in physical intimacy/extreme horniness that excludes sex. The closest to that in English would be to make out with someone.

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5 points

petting?

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3 points

Oh. Yeah. Forgot about that. I looked up “rummachen” and there wasn’t a good translation

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Yes. The LGBT+ community sometimes uses the word outercourse (as opposed to intercourse ) also play is a supercategory.

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0 points
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I think they consider sex to be sinful if it’s not purely for the sake of procreation.

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That’s the case for a lot of modern Christian ministries, though they’ll hum and haw about circumstances, such as if an infertile woman should have sex with her husband.

The scholarly consensus regarding Paul’s proscriptions is that even childbearing is inappropriate since the apocalypse is imminent. That sex is only allowed to sate men whose lust burns too hot (or something to that effect.)

Obviously, the apocalypse didn’t happen before that generation died, and Christians had to renegotiate with their dogma.

It’s also noted that there’s no such thing as rape or consent at the time, in that in any sexual encounter, the dominating / penetrating individual is the one taking power and is presumed to have agency. So when two guys get it on, the top is guilty of adultery or fornication (and is killed for such sins) but the bottom is free of responsibility. He is killed anyway because the incident pollutes the land with bad spirit and requires the death to regain its purity (which is really rather chthonic for what becomes a very spirity dogma).

There’s a lot of apologetics devoted to navigating this because otherwise modern Christians have to contend with the lack of consensual sex, the chattelization of women and active participation in institutionalized sex slavery (non-Hebrews captured in war were totally allowed to be sex slaves), so it’s all a mess.

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