How much TP did you use to use? I’m usually in the 2-4 squares range, which is usually enough to get a clean wipe. I imagine I’d still be in that range w/ a bidet, I’d just be a bit cleaner. My trick is to buy non-crappy TP, so I don’t need to double up (Costco brand is the perfect mix of strong and cheap).

I use a bottle filled with mountain dew and spray my asshole with that. After 6 months of use my asshole is permanently stained radical. When I fart I basically do a backflip.

Plus side, it’s basically impossible to clog your toilet with that stuff. It’s effectively pipe grease.

My old work ordered everything from uline, and I started bringing in my own TP specifically because of how awful it is to use that tissue paper.

Legitimately feels like tissue paper that people stuff gift bags with.

But at the same time, almost slippery.

And you WILL know if you creased the paper the wrong way, because it WILL stab at you with the force of ten thousand teeny tiny needles.

Is it the high gloss stuff, or the 80 grit option?

Does it flake like a French pastry?

You just gotta keep using it until your anus naturally builds up callouses.