You are viewing a single thread.
View all comments
59 points

Every once in a while I get a Uline catalog sent to me.I have looked at that same sort of industrial Jumbo roll. Very tempting.

permalink
report
reply
74 points

If it’s the uline jumbo rolls my work gets… Please don’t.

Your asshole will thank me

permalink
report
parent
reply
63 points

You just gotta keep using it until your anus naturally builds up callouses.

permalink
report
parent
reply
29 points

I rarely physically shudder from text

permalink
report
parent
reply
8 points

I too try to only shit on company time

permalink
report
parent
reply
8 points

My wife keeps telling me that…

permalink
report
parent
reply
7 points

If you don’t use a bidet, your butthole is already calloused. I learned this the first time I pooped in a normal toilet after getting my bidet.

permalink
report
parent
reply
3 points

I think this is the worst thing I’ve ever read

permalink
report
parent
reply
2 points

What a terrible day to have eyes.

permalink
report
parent
reply
19 points

Is it the high gloss stuff, or the 80 grit option?

permalink
report
parent
reply
10 points

Does it flake like a French pastry?

permalink
report
parent
reply
26 points

I only wipe my ass with croissants to keep my cheeks buttery smooth

permalink
report
parent
reply
3 points

The toilet paper or his asscheeks?

permalink
report
parent
reply
7 points

Plus side, it’s basically impossible to clog your toilet with that stuff. It’s effectively pipe grease.

permalink
report
parent
reply
7 points

My old work ordered everything from uline, and I started bringing in my own TP specifically because of how awful it is to use that tissue paper.

Legitimately feels like tissue paper that people stuff gift bags with.

But at the same time, almost slippery.

And you WILL know if you creased the paper the wrong way, because it WILL stab at you with the force of ten thousand teeny tiny needles.

permalink
report
parent
reply
9 points

Try a bidet first. I still use TP to dry off the wet, but way less TP.

permalink
report
parent
reply
2 points

I use a bottle filled with mountain dew and spray my asshole with that. After 6 months of use my asshole is permanently stained radical. When I fart I basically do a backflip.

permalink
report
parent
reply
1 point

Well, shit. If I could do a backflip just from spraying my asshole with mountain dew then sign me up.

permalink
report
parent
reply
1 point

How much TP did you use to use? I’m usually in the 2-4 squares range, which is usually enough to get a clean wipe. I imagine I’d still be in that range w/ a bidet, I’d just be a bit cleaner. My trick is to buy non-crappy TP, so I don’t need to double up (Costco brand is the perfect mix of strong and cheap).

permalink
report
parent
reply

People Twitter

!whitepeopletwitter@sh.itjust.works

Create post

People tweeting stuff. We allow tweets from anyone.

RULES:

  1. Mark NSFW content.
  2. No doxxing people.
  3. Must be a tweet or similar
  4. No bullying or international politcs
  5. Be excellent to each other.

Community stats

  • 9.9K

    Monthly active users

  • 866

    Posts

  • 41K

    Comments