And then everyone clapped.
i know people on the Internet have seemingly impossibly boring lives where nothing ever happens to them - but this isn’t even that hard to believe
That when they arrived in the Hospital Like half an hour later they still had blood in their mouth that they didnt wash out, wipe away or anything?
It just seems like a bit much to be believable to me.
It makes me think of a story that they wanted to tell, but they realized it was maybe kind of boring, so they added fun details for the sake of it.
I’m sure elements of it are true, like I’d be willing to bet the whole thing about the damage going from a d4 to d6 was just a conversation.
It’s a cute story for sure, but for me, it’s a touch beyond the suspension of disbelief.
But hey, if I’m wrong, I wish them many happy returns.
Once when my sister and I were teenagers, she was hogging the computer and so I just picked up the chair with her in it to move her out of my way. As I walked past, her friend (whom I hadn’t touched) used her bite to make an attack of opportunity against me. It wasn’t gentle - there was no blood but there were tooth-marks.
I had mixed feelings afterwards. On the one hand, it hurt. On the other hand, a girl touched me. With her mouth. I had never been kissed at that point but being bitten was close…
(I didn’t end up marrying her.)
Also a d6 bite is nonsense. The average commoner has 4 hp and 10 strength, so one commoner would be able to kill another commoner with a single bite 50% of the time. I’m not saying a human bite can’t be lethal, but it’s not “stabbed with a shortsword” lethal. Meanwhile, even a d4 bite from a level 1, 16-str barbarian is already invariably lethal to a commoner.
(Yeah, I know, HP isn’t supposed to be realistic, etc. I just hate fun.)
Given the nastiness of the human mouth, “fight bite” (hand cuts from accidentally punching teeth) is often treated with antibiotics. On that basis I’d stick with at most 1d2 damage, plus lingering status effects to the hand unless you have disease curing abilities or medicaments. Maybe the damage sticks unless specially treated, and untreated you can lose the hand to infection?
Yeah, a bite is more like a dagger than a short sword. Plus barbarians already get an extra +2 damage while raging, which makes their bites average more than a d6 plus strength with the same max damage.
Beast barbarians can even cause their teeth to grow during a rage giving them a d8 bite attack.
I mean, if you’re going to attempt to kill with a bite, I’d assume they’re going for the neck or other particularly vulnerable place. I’d argue commoner bite attacks should have very low chance to hit, but could plausibly be lethal. Most places they get a good bite won’t be able to do any damage, except maybe cause a Con save for disease… I’d say an improvised attack with Disadvantage for 1d6 damage probably works pretty well.
Props to this person for never washing their mouth off their friend’s blood. I’m sure they had the chance to do it, but chose to walk all over the hospital with their mouth covered in blood so that the nurse could see it, otherwise the joke wouldn’t have landed.
You ever try to get blood out in a hurry?
I mean, obviously this is the internet and nothing is real, but it’s not impossible that they still had some blood on them in the frenzy to get to the hospital.
I don’t know how hospitals work in the US (assuming that OP is a US citizen, because that’s what we do on the internet), but where I come from, determining the cause of an injury is very important to decide on an effective treatment. Bites in particular are very nasty and can lead to a lot of scary complications (including human bites!).
There’s no way in hell the nurse just said “yeah ok got it fam” and went along with her day like it wasn’t important.
And maybe I’m too jaded, but I read “we also got engaged” and my mind automatically added “and everyone clapped” at the end of the sentence lol
I feel like there’s not much hygiene difference between a human bite and a rat. They’re probably both equally bad
There’s no way in hell the nurse just said “yeah ok got it fam” and went along with her day like it wasn’t important.
I suspect that, if true, it was clarified further down the line before treatment. Or, considering how I’ve been in-and-out of the ER, the nurse just wrote down ‘human bite’ regardless of what the patient claimed lmao.
Like I said. It’s the internet. I’m not saying it’s definitely real. But it’s far from impossible.
OP got blood-bonded lmao
That’s just kinky with extra steps
