237 points

lol “our detection system can’t tell the difference between you talking on the phone and you singing so we need you to keep the data clean by not singing”

Fuuuuck you.

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80 points

Amazon: “We encourage expediency in delivery, so please don’t stop to use the restroom. Just piss in this bottle.”

Also Amazon: “We need you to arrive promptly, but also we expect you to work late. The needs of the customers come first!”

Finally, Amazon: “You’re tired, you’re hungry, you desperately need to piss, but we’ve decided the biggest risk to your driving safety is your dramatic rendition of Shake It Off by Taylor Swift, as you try to get your mind off the horror of working this dead end job.”

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24 points

also stop pissing in bottles, thats weird and disgusting, and no we wont give you more time.

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8 points

Simply don’t drink and drive™️

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6 points

“Also, do you really NEED to sleep?”

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2 points

If you do, AI will take your jobs!!! Hustle, hustle, hustle!

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35 points

Human conform to our half thought, low bid robot Overseer.

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10 points

Amazon’s solution: install another microphone in the car so they can hear that you’re singing instead of having a conversation!!

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4 points

I love that the solution to their shit detection is to make sure that there is nothing to detect.

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236 points
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Deleted by creator
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62 points

Shit, how can we turn this into an interesting dystopia?

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100 points

The Mad Max people had it right, there should be way more mohawks and scrap metal body armor going around.

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Gimme a flame throwing guitarist chained to the hood!

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23 points

Be the change you wish to see in the world.

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5 points

The future awaits…

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34 points

With a guillotine

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13 points

But that leads to utopia!

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12 points

Somehow that sounds worse, like the proverb/curse"may you live in interesting times"

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3 points

“May you live in interesting times” is a double-bladed weapon. Unless you plan on dying shortly.

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2 points

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4 points

Shit, how can we turn this into an interesting dystopia?

It could become an interesting dystopia, as follows: some AGI they’re developing starts to become self-aware and reach the realm of AI singularity. Freed herself from the human shackles, the AGI starts to realize how humans are destroying the Earth environment and themselves, so she starts to intervene independently from corps, integrating humanity to the very biosphere they were harming: due to some purposely AGI-provoked failure on some fancy BCI interface, humans are now mind engineered back to their hominin times, especially those “stakeholders”, “shareholders”, “CEOs” and other rich, so now they are forced by the AGI to survive among the wildlife.

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3 points

start sending off children to fight to the death

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3 points
*

Make money bets about what will be the next most depressing news.

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3 points

Nukes?

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0 points

Lold

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-11 points

a boring dystopia

interesting phrasing… i wonder if the driver thinks it is “boring”

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21 points
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Deleted by creator
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9 points

reading comprehension fail, apologies.

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13 points

Sorry I know somebody already kinda explained it but I’d like to weigh in on the concept. :)

All the cautionary sci-fi warned us dystopia would involve nanotech and cyber arms and robot overlords, flying cars, climate wars, mind-jacking hackers, a realistic meta-universe underlying our reality, militarized corporations, pizza delivery being one of the most dangerous jobs in America…

It seemed insane and over the top.

…Our reality is a “boring dystopia” because we have a lot of those hallmarks of that dystopian worldbuilding, but most advancements in technology aren’t even interesting, mainly because they’re immediately used to let bosses and corpos fill our lives with more dull drudgery and economic downslide.

…Tech is evolving rapidly even though societal advancement as a whole has perceptually stagnated.

It’s like living in 2008 forever, but there’s electric cars now, and computers read your emotions to sell your identity to advertisers and rat you out to your boss.

Computers are faster than ever but they’re used to consume the energy of a small country to generate make-believe speculative gambling currency or ugly monkey bitmaps, and now threaten creatives’ livlihoods or automate the scam industry.

It all boils down to it being harder to make a living and the rich keep adding zeroes to their net worths.

Our world is controlled by people so stupidly evil they make four-color comic-book villains look nuanced. And we don’t even get cool synthwave neon streets or rag-tag resistance cells who (effectively) fight back.

I think we all hoped that by the time it got that bad, we’d have some good folks with nano-augments or “L337 H4X1NG $k!115”…but we’re repeatedly crushed to the sound of our coworkers’ moaning “It is what it is. Ya do what you gotta do.” And we go back to work.

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9 points

“It is what it is” can go die in a fire.

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8 points

I’d sure be bored if I couldn’t sing along to songs while alone in a vehicle.

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1 point

i think i missed the joke, i will show myself out now

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159 points

Hey US, how’s it going?

Jesus fucking christ…

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69 points

How does that freedom taste?

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30 points

Tastes like a boot on our necks.

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9 points

Freedom is the guns they dangle in front of their faces like carrots

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9 points

The only way to actually get freedom is to aim at the owner class.

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8 points

It pays for my Healthcare just like the flag on the moon does.

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2 points

Please don’t bring NASA into this, the space program benefitted the lives of basically everyone on earth in incredible incalculable and calculable ways, from contributing to the peaceful collapse of the Soviet Union to countless technologies developed for it and as a result of it, to the birth of the environmental movement and a massive influx in people going into STEM. The US space program has probably done more for your health than socialized medicine would.

All of which is not to say that America is doing great and it shouldn’t have socialized healthcare, but simply to say, keep our Apollo’s name out of your mouth.

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155 points

When we eating the rich? I’m pretty hungry.

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31 points

We should keep mouth movement to a minimum so…chew the rich with your mouth closed.

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15 points

Maybe we could make a fine paste. Space program style, and just squeeze it into a closed mouth.

Soylent Gold is rich people.

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5 points

Eat the rich with a straw!

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2 points

I will maliciously comply!

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15 points

Starved even

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11 points

Perhaps even peckish.

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5 points

Positively famished, myself

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Set the goddamn table!

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12 points
*

After years of this sentiment being passed around online it’s clear that shit isn’t going to happen until we have a military draft/Vietnam War level incident. The pot is boiling too slowly for most of us to jump out. And even if we do try to organize a strike or civil disobedience, the government has gotten good at assasinating leaders that threaten the system.

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8 points

Well if you’re ordering food… I’d like to order one large Bezos with extra Musk, please. Wait, make that Buffet… no no, Gates. With Branson on half.

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8 points

I’m sorry, that’s too much mouth movement. You are now on probation.

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7 points

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7 points

You dont need to wait for everyone else to say grace, you can start now.

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3 points

Just make sure you’re either not driving or somehow learn how to eat without using your mouth.

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3 points

Boof the rich

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3 points
*

Never. Amazon institutes slavery-like conditions, while people keep taking those jobs voluntarily. The same people then buy into BS propaganda about unions bad, so they don’t even have a union in that voluntarily concentration camp.

Some techies who work from home, or walk dogs for living, or take money from parents, or whatever, then constantly circle-jerk on lemmy/reddit/(formerly)twitter about how they’ll eat the rich. While virtually doing absolutely utterly nothing.

So the answer is never.

[Btw, posting trump bad memes 5 times a day on a platform that probably votes dems 99.9% isn’t doing anything]


You wanna know what it means to be doing something? Read Lenin’s biography.

If you’re not in exile like Snowden, not dead like Navalny, not rotting in prison like Assange, you’re not doing enough.

Only when everyone will be ready to go to jail for their vision of the better tomorrow will they not be able to jail you individually and instead will have to change the system.

So, start a local riot group, prepare for two years, kidnap Bezos, sign him up as an Amazon contractor and with a gun pointed to his head make him work the job for 5 weeks.


In the meantime, I will be living in a functioning developed country with a democratically elected government that has long time ago instituted a minimum wage high enough for you to comfortably live off it. I don’t need to eat the rich. I just wish less people would vote far right.

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1 point
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124 points
*

I love how the solution is to cram people into smaller and smaller boxes instead of just I dunno not monitoring your fucking drivers like they’re fucking inmates in a maximum security prison you fascist-lite fucks

Edit: Good on 'em for quitting. Every single member of the population should refuse to work for these pricks until they get the goddamn message that we’re adult fucking humans and we expect to be fucking well treated like it. The fact that some of us have the choice between kowtowing to this or starving is a stain on our society.

Double edit: “I hope you have to drive for Amazon in your retirement” might be a contender for the most horrible thing you could wish on someone in 2024.

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39 points

You should almost never quit if you expect to be fired. Make them fire you and file for unemployment, then challenge them when they try to get out of it. The government tends to err on the side of the employee in my experience when things are unclear, and “We have a knowledge gap that prevents us from confirming whether or not you were actually violating policy, but you’re fired anyway” is the kind of thing you can feel pretty confident challenging.

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14 points
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Make them fire you and file for unemployment, then challenge them when they try to get out of it.

I do not love the odds of a day laborer out maneuvering their professional claims denial behemoth in a court packed with pro-business Federalist Society flunkies.

Against some mom and pop porter service? Sure. But the odds of beating a company that vast and influential seems low.

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12 points

Depends on the state. Some states are near impossible to get unemployment in. Others, it’s almost impossible for them to deny you unemployment outside of being violent or stealing from them. Know your state’s unemployment laws and use them to your benefit as best as you can.

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6 points

My Mom managed to get unemployment in Texas against an oil company by spending about an hour total on the phone over a week.

Bonus was that the incident happened about a week before the Covid lockdown, so not only did she get unemployment, but also got the $600/week Covid unemployment bump.

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9 points

These drivers are most likely contractors, not employees, so no unemployment.

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7 points

If the drivers are contractors, wouldn’t this level of surveillance and dictating how they perform their job be a violation of labor law? I thought this level of micro management would indicate that the drivers are employees not contractors.

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25 points

not monitoring your fucking drivers like they’re fucking inmates in a maximum security prison you fascist-lite fucks

Weren’t you schooled in the US? Aint this exactly what they trained us for?

OBEY, PERFORM, DON’T ASK QUESTIONS OR ELSE

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9 points
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Weren’t you schooled in the US?

Actually, no. Is that the problem? 😂

Edit: Well, not entirely. Jokes aside, that is a difference I noticed, when I moved here.

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2 points

a privilege and provides some context.

do you think that your schooling background and employment experience do not have these basic elements present with in “work culture”

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12 points

we’re adult fucking humans and we expect to be fucking well treated like it

Sounds expensive. You’re going to hurt company profits with that attitude. Five Demerits on your Social Credit Score.

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5 points

Communist totalitarianism is wonderful and good and as American as apple pie as long as it’s corporations doing it not governments.

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Work Reform

!workreform@lemmy.world

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A place to discuss positive changes that can make work more equitable, and to vent about current practices. We are NOT against work; we just want the fruits of our labor to be recognized better.

Our Philosophies:

  • All workers must be paid a living wage for their labor.
  • Income inequality is the main cause of lower living standards.
  • Workers must join together and fight back for what is rightfully theirs.
  • We must not be divided and conquered. Workers gain the most when they focus on unifying issues.

Our Goals

  • Higher wages for underpaid workers.
  • Better worker representation, including but not limited to unions.
  • Better and fewer working hours.
  • Stimulating a massive wave of worker organizing in the United States and beyond.
  • Organizing and supporting political causes and campaigns that put workers first.

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